People refer to self esteem and self worth all the time, but how do you really know if it is a problem for you? Low self esteem manifests in a variety of outcomes. This list is not extensive and may seem strange in that is is often contradictory, that is because we are all individuals, and we have different coping strategies from others. One person with low self esteem may choose to stay out of the lime light all together, while another, may feel the need to prove themselves all the time, both of these, though almost opposite, are a symptom or self esteem.
- Anxiety and emotional turmoil, especially around doubting self, being acceptable, others liking you, how you feel about yourself, faking it to be liked.
- Constantly concerned about managing others judgments on yourself.
- Being very concerned over what you imagine other people think, and always imagining they think the worst.
- Being very judgmental of yourself.
- Constantly striving for perfection and beating yourself up because you cannot achieve the unrealistic expectations you have set for yourself.
- Feeling like you are “not good enough” no matter how well you do.
- Never acknowledging or being unable to or celebrating your genius or successes.
- Lack of social skills and self confidence.
- Depression and/or bouts of sadness.
- Inability to accept compliments.
- Always seeing the negative in a situation, (what can and will go wrong) interestingly this can extend to an excellent eye for detail.
- Treating yourself badly but NOT other people.
- Speaking to yourself harshly/badly or cruelly.
- Worrying whether you have treated others badly, and often taking on guilt and blame for things you have no responsibility for.
- Reluctance to take on challenges in case you fail.
- Feeling like you are a failure when something you do fails, or a looser when you lose at something.
- Always taking on challenges to prove yourself “good enough”.
- Feeling that if people will “find out who you really are” they will not like or love you.
- Unwillingness to be yourself, because you believe you are unlovable as you are.
- Reluctance to put yourself first or anywhere.
- Reluctance to trust your own opinion.
- Or feeling crushed if someone has a contrary opinion to you.
- Creating worst case outcomes in your mind whenever something happens, that make you feel anxious and fearful.
- Expecting little out of life for yourself.
- Not being able to recognize and acknowledge how and where you are successful.
- Not being able to say you love yourself.
- Not being able to say you like yourself.
- Not being able to say you appreciate yourself.
- Not believing in others liking, or loving or appreciating you.
- lack of confidence in your own opinions
- Lack of assurance when you make a decision / second guessing your self all the time.
If a variety of these are issues for you, and stop you from living your ideal life, then you are dealing with low self esteem /low self worth. There is a solution.
For some free resources for dealing with low self esteem, go to the blogs section of this website. If you are serious and dedicated, and looking for one on one help in solving this problem, and want to know about Self Esteem Coaching with Angela Hardy Click here
Disclaimer: The journey of personal development, healing, developing self esteem and self love are a deeply individual experiences, how long it takes and the results achieved, do vary from person to person.